I’m Getting to Old For This Shit

That’s me, in the green shirt, passed out on the bed; that’s Rub, with his shirt off, laying next to me (damn he’s hot isn’t’ he?).  This pic was taken in our hotel room by Anginae at about 5 A.M. last Sunday morning right after we had rolled in from a night at the bars.

Last weekend was another relatively wild weekend for me.  It started of Friday night by taking Anginae to get a tattoo (two cherries on her right shoulder), going to dinner, and then hanging out for a little bit at the gay block party being held for Pride weekend in OKC.  It wasn’t bad, I got hit on by some old guy, but the best part was nearly running into my step brother.  We waved to him, but he was walking into a bar and didn’t see us (Anginae says he ignored us).

Next day Anginae and I drive a couple of hours to small city to hang out with Rub.  Rub is looking into buying the only gay bar in this town and was going to be bartending for the weekend.  We hang out, watch the drag show, drink beer and stick around until 1 AM when the place closes.  After that we go with a group that runs the bar to an all night diner and hang out there for a little bit.  At about 3 AM, Rub, Anginae, Little K (more on him in just a sec) and I go to another local bar and Rub proceeds to get me drunk.  After the 5-6 beers from earlier, he adds a Jack and Coke, a shot a Patron, a shot of Jagermeister, and finally a vodka and cranberry juice.  All damn good stuff I must say, but way plenty to get me drunk.  The kicker was the first full cigarette that I’ve ever smoked.  It was nice, but once the nicotine started working with the alchohol, I was done.  Rub and Anginae got me to stagger back to the car (they were not drunk) then a short drive back to the hotel, where I proceed to puke in the parking lot.  Shit I hate being such a pussy when it comes to drinking.

So here the night pretty much ends and there you see me above after it’s all over.  A few moments later I strip down to my underwear and cuddle up next to Rub for the night.  I get to wake up and lay with him for most of the morning which was pretty damn nice.  This is all new to me.  Not just being with Rub, but all of it.  It’s different, but it’s fun and I’m glad I am getting to experience all this.

One more thing I discovered was a serious jealous streak in me.  You see, Little K is a nice guy that hung out at the bar all night too.  This was actually his second night at the bar and had met Rub the previous night while Rub was bartending.  Rub is an extremely nice guy and was kind enough to let Little K hang out with us.  It was pretty quick to see that LK had his eyes on Rub as well.  Later in the evening he had more than his eyes on him, he had his hand on Rubs leg some of the night.  I wasn’t quite sure how to take all this, but I sure as hell was shooting jealous, evil looks at LK all evening long, something which Rub noticed me doing as well.  Nothing ever happened.  Rub nicely told LK he wasn’t looking for anything other than being friends, and LK eventually left.  There’s a bit more the the Rub/LK story, but I don’t want to go into it.

So there you go, another happenin’ weekend for me.  I was really glad Anginae got to go and she had a great time.  I think Rub may actually go through with buying this bar so I’m sure there is a good chance I will be back.  I don’t know how much more excitement I can take, but I guess I’m willing to try.

Kiss & Tell

Things continue to move along for both me and Anginae.  I’m not really going to go into any details about her (since she told me not to) but I can say all I want about me.

I shared the details of my first gay date and all that went on that evening.  Since then I’ve met Rub for lunch a couple of times and also went on a couple more dates.  The lunches have been just that, lunch.  I only have 45 min or so and that’s taking a long lunch so all we really get a chance to do is talk for a few minutes.  It’s nice but its short and sweet.

Our second date however is where things got a little more interesting.  It’s not so much where we went this time, but what we did….before the date really even started.   Let me just say that I have gathered more evidence that I really may be gay.  To put it bluntly, we made out, took off our clothes, he sucked my dick, I sucked his dick, we jerked each other off and to top it off, Rub shot is cum all over my chest.  Then we went out and had pizza.  Enough details for ya?

Second date proved just as interesting.  I met Rub after work the other night along with a friend of his at a nearby lake where Rub’s friend had pulled his ski boat out of storage for the first time this summer.  We pent a little time on the water before grabbing some dinner, changing and heading yet again to the same bar from a couple of weeks ago for karaoke.  Rub was going only to meet his sister-in-law and we wind up staying until they shut the place down.  Way too long for the both of us but he did not want to leave her behind.  We get to our motel room at about 2:30 A.M. (he does not have a place right now really……long story) and we of course don’t go straight to sleep.  More of the same as above except I now get to check topping a guy off my bucket list.  So we finally get to sleep about 4 A.M. only for both of us to have to wake about at about 7 A.M. for each of us to get to work (spending the night with a guy, check #2 for the night).  I’m really hoping the next date we have is not quite as hectic.

In between all this Rub has come over to the house to meet Anginae and the kids.  She and the kids really like him a lot; hell he’s a great guy so I wasn’t at all surprised.  I was really happy with how the evening he came over here went.  The three of us wound up sitting on the back porch ’til about 11:30 on a Sunday night.  BTW, Anginae decided to throw in getting really drunk on vodka to make the evening fun for all.

So that’s pretty much the summary of events of what all that has gone down with since the last post.  Like I’ve mentioned lots has happened with Anginae as well, but I think she is going to keep that to herself.  It’s not my business to talk about it really other than to say I know all about it and I’m completely ok with it.  So long as she comes home safe, is happy and honest with me about everything, we are good.  I’m not going to get into my feelings about Rub here just yet.  I’ve got a lot to say about that, but right now I’m just in the mood to give all the dirty details.

Standing On the Edge of the Cliff…

….and I feel like I just jumped off.

That’s what the last week, especially Saturday night, felt like.

Gay initiation…..drinking from a fire hose…baptism by flames….call it what you will but that what last night felt like.

I mentioned in my last post that I’ve been talking to a guy online and on the phone, henceforth known as Rub, and Saturday night I finally met him in person.  Except this was more than just a meeting, this turned out to be a date….my first gay date, and as first gay dates go, mine is one I shall never forget.

Last week I had a couple of nice conversations online and on the phone with Rub and I had pretty much decided I wanted to meet him.  He is a very low pressure kinda guy and so I had convinced myself I was ready.  In the middle of the week, everything was coming together to meet on Saturday; kids outta the house at grandparents, Anginea arranging a “date” with the guy she had recently met, so all that was left was for me to muster the nerve to meet up with my guy.  Thing is, Rub wanted to attend some of the PRIDE weekend activities; mainly the parade and a concert.  This idea scared the crap outta me, but Rub convinced me to come up, we meet and go eat or something, and then I could head out before the parade and concert started if I wanted to.  That sounded good to me so I headed up to see him.

We meet, he’s very nice (and cute), go eat dinner and have a nice time.  Things are going pretty much as I expected.  We leave the restaurant and notice that the streets are blocked off (my truck is blocked in the parking lot).  We ask around and low and behold, the PRIDE parade it going to be coming through.  I jokingly accuse Rub of some devious plan to get me down here, but he claims complete innocence.  So I get to attend my first gay pride parade, complete with leather daddy’s, drag queens, topless male dancers, and of course, protesters holding up bible verses denouncing all the evil homos in attendance.

So after that, we go down to the park which has been hosting all the PRIDE day events for a concert and fireworks.  Lot’s of people around and I spend most of my time just taking it all in.  We sit and watch the concert….sit closely to each other at that….and soon there after I have my first ever gay kiss.  We kissed!!!   Not just some peck either, it was a real kiss… several nice long kisses..and I’m doing it all out in the open…at a fucking gay pride festival.

Concert and fireworks over, we walk around a little (holding hands some) and then head out (to stop so I can pee like I have never had to pee before….3 beers and 16oz of water have to come out somehow).  Pee break done so what’s next?  I know, a gay bar.  Better yet, a gay bar that’s about to have a drag show.  So here I am, crammed into a tiny, smokey gay bar, with Rub holding on to me, gays all around.  It was pretty entertaining so we hung around until about 1 am before the late night part of the show started.  I drive him home and before he goes in, we spend a couple of minutes sitting in my truck making out.

That was it, in a nutshell.  One of the most surreal, unbelievable nights of my entire life.  I still is hard to take in all that happened.  It’s not so much that I met him, it’s the almost comical set of events that I took part in throughout the night on my first ever date with a guy.  In a way I was so busy taking in all that was going on I kinda felt like I was disconnected from him and busier checking out everything around me.  I was certain I had a deer in the headlights look on me a good part of the night, but Rub assures me I did not.  He has said he had a great time and really looks forward to meeting again.  So far he seems like a really great guy; he’s understanding of the situation I’m in and Anginea really seems to like him a lot.

A couple days on now and I’ve had a little more time to absorb everything that went on.  I’m actually looking more forward to meeting Rub again than I was after I dropped him off.  Without sounding too egotistical, I’m really proud of myself for not chickening out.  As overwhelming as the whole night was, I’m very glad to have done it.  I’m even happier that Rub still wants to see me again as well and I’m sure we will be getting together again this week however this time I’m sure won’t be nearly as eventful.

I have so much more to say about what’s going on right now.  I barely even mentioined what all is happening with Anginae which is just a big as my whole story.  Stay tuned, there is much more to come.

Catching Up

Hello blog, it’s been a little while.  Same old excuse really so you all know the drill by now.  Work, family (which includes baseball & t-ball right now), sleep and back to work.  Not complaining really.  I’ve got a good job that I like, I’m happy to be with my family when I can, and who does not like to sleep every now and then.  So as usual due to how busy I am, my blog and all my faithful readers are the ones to suffer.

I’ve had a little success with the Craigslist ad I posted a couple of times.  I’ve chatted with 2-3 pretty nice guys so far out of all the responses, and…hold on to your asses…..even called and talked to one guy on the phone.  It was a nice friendly (and short) conversation, but I’m sure I will be talking to him some more.  He seems like a very patient and understanding guy and I’ve enjoyed my chats with him so far.  I may post another ad and see if I get any more replies, but I probably won’t bother with Craigslist too much longer.

Anginae posted an ad as well and got some rather interesting responses.  She’s a little discouraged from it actually.   Even though she’s been pretty clear she’s not just looking for sex, some guys are hard to get the clue.  I guess some guys think the surest way to win a lady is the describe their cock to them (or better yet, send a pic of it).  I’ve told her that the best you can hope for one or two guys that are decent and worth talking to.  She’s just taking things slowly and seeing where it goes.

We are both being careful as possible about all this.  We are not keeping things from each other and being as open as possible about everything.  It’s not perfect and it’s not for everybody married couple but we are going to do what is best for us.

Lightweight

I’m not much of a drinker.  Never have been and probably never will be.  I never drank in high school and very little in college.  I’ve never been shit faced, passed out drunk in my life, but I have been drunk enough a few times to be a pretty unsteady on my feet.

Last night for some reason I decided to have a Jack and Coke after the kids went to bed.  A fairly strong one at that (for me at least).  I did not have the intent to get drunk but figured “what the hell”.  I had the first one and could definitely feel the alcohol working it’s magic so decided to go for a second.    Second one was just about as strong so by the bottom of the second glass I would classify myself as being drunk.  I knew exactly what was going on and can remember everything that happened, but lets just say I was quite relaxed by my nearly 6+ shots of liquid courage.

Anginae and I decided to retire to the bedroom and some sex began to occur (no I don’t need to be drunk to sleep with my wife).  I was a little wobbly and my head was spinning but things were going along pretty good.  I made the comment to her that now is the time to ask if she can use my new toy on me.  A little later she asked and did exactly that.  I’m a little embarrassed that I let her but she says she didn’t mind at all.  I also have to admit it’s more fun to have someone use it on the while you relax than put it in yourself (it felt pretty damn good too).

After we were all done was the best part.  We were all finished up and I had come back from the bathroom and sat on the side of the bed.  My head had been spinning and I was beginning to feel a little woosey.  So how did I finish up our night of wild sex…..I puked in the toilet.  Nice huh.

Well I guess not being able to hold my liquor isn’t something to really be ashamed of.  Like I said I’ve never been much of a drinker so it’s no wonder it doesn’t take me much to send me over the edge.   I just wish I could handle of couple of stiff drinks without finding myself lying on the counch sick.  I guess I just need to keep on working on my alcohol tolerance if I want to be able to drink more.  Just one more thing to add to my list of shit to do.

One More Time

You may recall some time ago I set up a couple of online accounts to try and meet a guy online.  I met a few nice guys to talk to but,  never made it any further than chatting online.  I was trying to take things nice and slow and didn’t get to the point of actually meeting someone in person.  I started my search after talking it over with Anginae.  She had said she was open to me trying to meet a guy and we had talked it over some before I started.  After a while it became apparent that we just were not ready for me to do something like that.  She started to have some issues with me being online and soon after that I fell into one of my “I’m not gay” slumps.   Soon after that I’ve deleted all my accounts that I had set up and that was it.

So here I am months later giving it another go.  I think this time will be a little different.  This time Anginae has been a bit more encouraging for me to try it.  I don’t know how it’s gonna turn out this time but I’m very curious to find out.  I’m still going to take it pretty slowly though.  So far I’ve put out one ad on Craigslist the other day and I was surprised with the response.  I got about 30 or so emails to what I thougth was a pretty boring ad.  I specifically stated I was did not want to hook up and that I was married with a family.  Of couse I deleted at lease half of the responses right away.   Including the size of your cock (or a pic) got you tossed and some guys were a little too old (there I go with the age thing again).  I replied to about 15 or so of the responses and so far I’ve chatted with about 7-8 of the guys on Yahoo Messenger.  Some of them seem pretty nice so far.  I’m still planning on taking things pretty slowly and being careful.  It’s hard to know who you can meet online and I don’t want to do anything too stupid.  I’ll keep you posted on how things go.

Hot Gay Sex

Hey there everyone.  Been a long time since my last post so I had to come up with a good post title.  Granted this post has nothing to do with hot gay sex but wouldn’t it be nice.  Did you think that perhaps my absence has been due to me having some hot gay sex, well sorry it has not and I don’t’ have any details of hot gay sex to share with you.  So far I have used the phrase ‘hot gay sex’ 5 times in this post.  That’s a lot of hot gay sex isn’t it (hey, there is again).

Hmmm…what to update on.  I’m still married, I’m still employed, still busy with the kids and ah yes, I’m still gay…the whole point of this blog right.  That’s about all the big things in my life really which I guess is good.  I’m still busy at work but our business is slowing down quite a bit at the moment.  Some layoffs and hour cutbacks are in store for some, but so far I think I’m pretty safe for a while.  Kids are busy for baseball season going on.  I’m not a big fan of baseball but I really enjoy the games so far.

Kids are away tonight and so Anginae and I have had a nice day out shopping and dinner.  We did something for the first time however…we went to a sex toy shop.  She was really embarrassed going in at first.  She’s never been in one, but once we got in there she was over being nervous pretty quickly.  The sex shops OK are pretty tame considering it’s illegal to sell pornography in the state (we live in a church state here) but they have sex toys, lingerie and other shit like that.  It was fun and Anginae got her a new vibrating cock (big) and I got me a little butt plug (something I’ve never had).  I’m probably just gonna try it myself, but who knows I may let her try it on me sometime.

I’m thinking of making some changes to my blog.  First I need to do a better job of posting, but I also need to refresh the look and also change some of my blog links.   I might add some more links to blogs and sites I like to look at.  There are some blogs I no longer read, but I don’t wanna take them off if they are linked to me, I just feel that it is a common courtesy to link back to them as well.  I may feel like posting some pics of guys I like to look at but I’m not quite sure yet.  I still have a few serious posts going, but I think I might like my blog to be more like  Nate’s and Dan’s which I both really like; a mix of guys and goings on in their lives. If any of you have some ideas plese let me know.

Round 1

Well go to sleep everyone.  This is going to pretty much be a “who gives a shit” post for all of you I’m sure, but It’s my blog so kiss my ass.

I’m a huge Formula 1 fan and this weekend is the long awaited season opener.  Once again the season starts with the Australian Grand Prix in Melbourne.  So far it looks like this season could get pretty interesting with a lot of new rule changes coming along.  Qualifying was early Saturday morning here in the US and so far that prediction is proving to be true.

I’m really hoping my guy Kimi Raikkonen (pic above) comes through this year.  He won the World Championship in 2007 but had a shitty year last year.  I’ve always been a fan a Kimi and it does not hurt that I’ve always thought he’s really hot.

Due to our stupid US congress moving daylights savings time up a couple of weeks, the season opener now starts after the beginning of DST which means the race won’t come on until Sunday at 12:30 AM CST instead of 11:30 PM on Saturday.  I’m gonna try and stay up to watch the start at least but I don’t think I’ll last until 3 AM or so when it will finish.

Enjoy!

Object of My Desire

I’ve often thought there are two types of people in this world; some who want an iPhone and others who have an iPhone. I’m kidding of corse. I’ve been wanting one since they came out and I finally broke down and got one a couple of weeks ago. So far I’m pretty happy with it and it came in pretty handy on the ski trip.

It is a complete waste of money. I have carried a company issued cell phone for the last seven years and now I’m paying to talk and for the AT&T data plan that goes along with it. I don’t blow money on much else so I guess it ok to splurge some of my hard earned money. By the way, I am writing this post using the iPhone WordPress app.

Snow White & Grumpy

Well as you may guess from the pic above I went skiing.  My very generous grandfather took me, the wife, kids and a good part of my immediate family (20+ people) on a skiing trip over spring break.  He paid for the whole thing including the airline tickets to get us there.  Everyone had a pretty good time and most everybody made it back in one piece with no major mishaps, although we later found out that one person came back with a minor broken bone after their last run down the hill of the whole trip.

I somehow got myself involved in planning most of the trip.  I handled most everything except the travel arrangements.  That meant booking all the rooms, equipment, lessons and lift tickets.  It was a little bit of work but I was happy to do it and it was a small price to pay for an all expenses paid trip.   The first day or two I was pretty wound up since I felt some responsibility to get everybody where they needed to be since I had arranged everything.  I figured by there 2nd day of the trip I could relax and enjoy skiing.  Instead I decided to be a pain in the ass to Anginae and the kids.

I have no good reason for my behavior.  To begin with, I felt bad leaving work while business is going so slowly at the moment so that bugged me.  The other is I guess I was a little disappointed they were not as much into skiing as I hoped they would.  I should have known.  Learning to ski is a lot of work and knowing my kids like I do, I should have expected them not to absolutely love it.  Anginae like it, but said it was a lot of work.  My daughter liked it but she is so young she could only do so much with one day of lessons.  My son said lessons were ok, but when we took him back out he fell a couple of times and was done for good.

I’m no great skier.  I’m pretty bad to be honest.  I’ve only been 3 times (including this trip) but I really enjoy it for some reason, despite the fact that I’m not athletic or coordinated at all.  I skied the first couple of days but spent the last day moping around and didn’t feel like skiing.  So there I was, surrounded by beautiful mountains, great weather, with my family and on a “free” ski trip and I was acting pissy towards Anginae and the kids.  I was rude to her and the kids.  I was a crummy husband and a crappy father.  I wish I had a good reason for acting the way I did but I don’t.   The day we left I felt better but then I was mad at myself for messing up Anginae’s trip and missing out on the last day I could ski.

I hope to try taking them on a ski trip again.  Even though Anginae and the kids were not crazy about skiing they really like being there.  I’ll just have to relax a little more and just let things happen instead of worrying about things going to plan.   By the way, I’ll give a bonus point to anybody that can guess where this pic was taken (excpet you Nate!).