Anginae signed the divorce petition Monday. We have decided to hold off on filing it until after the holidays are over but the decision has been made. We are not waiting because we are not ready but more because we don’t want to have to put up with telling everybody right now.
Anginae says that Monday was one of the happiest days she has had in a while. Knowing that put a smile on my face. The last two years together have not been difficult. Sure there have been some stressful times as we learned to cope with this, but now there is some closure to all of this. What would be the outcome of our marriage was always something there hanging over us. Now that we have come to this decision we can now more easily move forward. Sure there are going to be some sad and difficult moments ahead but we are not losing each other. This is just another step in the transformation of our relationship.
I’ll be honest. I am scared. This decision is going to cause many things to happen. First off will be telling my mom and stepdad. They are our only hope of parental support in all this. Anginae told her parents about the divorce an they are pissed to say the least. If they knew the full reason why it would be even worse. I of course don’t have my father to go to (and don’t want to) so I’m going to putting a lot of pressure on my mom to help us through this. I can’t help but feel she owes me this. There is working out the whole financial and living situation. Anginae is looking for more work and I will give her all the support I can. I think after the first of the year I will also start looking for a small place of my own closer to work. I’m conflicted as to whether to disclose to my boss why I am getting divorced. I know it seems like none of his business but it is a small company and I’d rather come clean instead of him somehow finding out. Finally there is a matter of my boyfriend. I like DMc a lot but I’m not sure he is up to the task of being with me right now. I don’t want to end it with him but I need a boyfriend that can be a support to me in all this. All I can do is hope he shares some of the same feelings I have for him, but if not I may have to make the tough decision and move on.
So this is it I guess. We are starting another chapter in our lives; one that I still can’t believe is happening. It is a mixture of many emotions ranging from sadness to excitement. The best part though is I will still have her in my life. I’m not losing her we are just settling into a different type of relationship. Despite how hard this is going to be, that thought alone makes a world of difference.
Again, congratulations. It’s a good step to take, and a good time to take it. Good luck with your mom and step-dad. I hope they can be a support to you.
Right step in the right direction. In the meantime, please wake up . . .you don’t have a boyfriend, you have a twink that lives with his mom. Is that boyfriend material? Do you deserve, need, want, truly think you can find a partner (I hate the word “boyfriend”) at this stage of your life? The answer is no. You need to concentrate on your family life, in having a respecftul divorce and defention of new roles and responsibilites. In all this, have you ever once mentioned your children? Please, forget the twink and focus on what is important. For once, don’t let your dick get ahead of your head.
Donny: DMc a twink? Perhaps. Boyfriend/partner material? I’m still working on that and only time will tell. My short answer is no, he’s not it but I think it’s too early to end things. As far as our kids I don’t usually bring them into this blog because I don’t feel they really belong here, but they are the top priority of both of us. Always have and always will be. Nothing we do in all this ever overlooks them. Will it be tough on them, yes but i think what we are doing will be best for them in the long run. The one constant we have found is that what causes problems for kids is the fighting between parents. Anginae and I don’t have any anger or animosity so that will go a long way to make this less difficult on everybody. And finally, stop thinking with my dick? You must really not get me at all from this blog.
Jay:
There is not a single ending to all our stories, though certainly I am coming to understand why so many people are sure there is–something about statistical weight.
But what you and Anginae have so far managed to do is a brave and wonderful thing. I wish you all the possible help in the difficult months and years ahead.
A word to the wise: it is also generally considered a good idea not to get too involved with ANYONE before you have worked through your divorce. That takes time.
You’ll be in a different place in a while… maybe you and the BF should take a breather and see where you are when the chips are done falling. [Once again, not that the glove will fit you, but it has fit a LOT of other people... everyone gets hurt when things come to an end. Better to go slow.]
But then, as I also say, what the hell do I know?
Hang in there.
T@C
I hope things go well for all of you. As a a very closeted gay married male, I’m glad you were able to accept yourself and are able to move on. I certainly wish you the best.
I think that since you have the support of one another, you two will get through this, and you will remain very close to one another.
It really isn’t anyone’s business–the reasons for the divorce. I don’t think you have to disclose the reasons to anyone.
If you ever need to vent…you have my email..
Even though this is a sad event, it’s probably for the best as now both of you can move on with your lives. At least it’s amicable…..could be far, far worse.
Telling the family is very hard….I know. No one is perfect, and they know that.
I wouldn’t go telling everyone why. It’s not their business. Many people will be very angry with you if they find out you left your young wife and children because you like guys.
Finally, I hope DMc will at least be a good friend for you to lean on. Not everyone you date has to be LTR material….he’s a friend and probably convenient sex….so what?
My love for you is everlasting. Changed it has. But everlasting for sure.
It might be a bit late to comment, however I want to say you are one of the most wonderful couples I’ve ever known and I’m sure no matter how bitter a divorce can be, you will manage well.
You know it’s not at all important what others say and you can keep the reasons to yourselves. Let the divorce thing gets to its end then decide on coming out to others because yo don’t need others to hate you twice.
I hope you had a great Thanksgiving
I forgot to say thanks to you for being a good friend
Wow…..
I am surprised at my reaction, but though I am not surprised… I am surprised…:)
From the tone of your post it seems that both you and Anginae are at peace with the new developments in your lives. That I am very happy about.
I wish you both all the best in the uncertain path that you both are about to tread. I am extra glad that even though you are going separate ways, you are doing it together. That I am sure your kids will appreciate in future.
Good luck
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