I am an early 30 something guy living in a very red state in the middle of the country. I’ve been married for over 10 years to a wonderful woman. I have two young kids. I’m also gay. I came out in October of 2007 to my wife. I’ve always known I was gay, and have dealt with it internally in may different ways. Now I’ve chosen to include my wife in my struggle. We love each other deeply. This is my story of starting to come out and dealing with all that comes along with it.
Hope you all enjoy my story.
I can’t wait to read more of your story… I am married to a man, came out almost 10 years ago, love him like crazy! We have learned make it work…
Anyway, I am looking forward to reading more… I stumbled upon you via a tag. Feel Free to email me.
Jen
Hey, mate! Glad to stumble across your site. My wife’s known I was “same-gender attracted” since early in our relationship… I just kept thinking it was some sin I could conquer with the right counselling and prayer and Bible study and friends and so on… but it was October 2007 that I finally said to her that I was gay, and announced I was leaving. I didn’t leave. We’re still trying to figure it all out.
I’m curious to see where your journey leads to…
Wayne
throughthestorm.wordpress.com
This is from my blog…….
I am one of those bisexuals who commits to one person while still attracted to other men and women, but do not act on any attraction except my wife. The key to successful marriages are far more likely when there is complete honesty, respect and a level of compassion for each other. My wife and I have a strong relationship and we are open to each other. She knows of my strong desires of being with men. She listens to my fantasies. I get hard thinking about getting laid by a man but I am keeping this as a dream, not a reality. Coming out bisexual is no easy matter and so far my wife and one of my daughters knows about me. I am very much interested in looking for friendship with married men who are also bisexual without getting into sex.
Anyway, when discussing sex, its very liberating to be open and letting my wife know that I am talking about something very important to her. You never know what your spouse likes unless you talk. Most of my fantasies are so compatible with my wife’s fantasies, including my bisexual fantasies. In order to have a warm, joyful, fulfilling relationship in which shared experiences encourage mutual growth and happiness is being open-minded with loving care heart. Confide all of who you really are. No masks. Share everything, including your wildest fantasies. Fantasies aren’t good or bad and there should be no judgment involved. Having a wild fantasy doesn’t mean it has to be expressed in reality. In order to have a wonderful exclusive and monogamy sexual relationship, we are to feel free sexually and feel sexual without restrictions.
I have a blog, and this blog is probably a good place to place my private thoughts and knowning that hardly anyone reads this, its a blessing or a curse.
Being scottish, the word kilt comes from the Scottish word kilt meaning to tuck up the clothes around the body. A Kilt is worn knee socks and sporran – a large pouch used to weigh down the front. Kilts returned to prominence during the romantic revival in the 19th century. The Scottish kilt is a symbol of brave and independent masculinity. Even Sean Connery who is scottish wears a kilt. I understand that women including my wife who find it VERY ATTRACTIVE to see a man wearing a kilt. I ran into some blogs that wives were trying to get their husbands, who is Scottish and trying to get him to wear a kilt for her! I want to get one for my wife so she can have “free access” to her toys.
Wow Jim. You bring up and issue that I have though about many times. Do you think it’s different when dealing with homosexuality as opposed to bisexuality?
I think commitment is the most important thing here. It’s just too bad my husband finds it so difficult. I’ve been committed to him my entire life – body and soul, heart and mind. Not kidding. I never said it wasn’t work. But he seems to think sometimes that he can’t work at it and be successful. It’s just his mentality. He has grown up being taught that he is a failure and so he naturally thinks he can’t be successful at anything – even staying committed to his wife.
OMG….this site is amazing and i see there are more. I came out to my wife just five weeks ago and all is hell… for the moment.
Reading your blog has been so refreshing and has given me hope and a greater feeling of empowerment – thank you.
I was briefly married to my college sweetheart and best friend a number of years ago and he suddenly walked out on our marriage with no explanation. It took me years to really figure out the real reason – he was gay – and had it come out at the time we split up I would have been nothing but supportive and perhaps I wouldn’t have lost my best friend. I was heartbroken at losing the friendship most of all. But I slowly got my life back together, fell in love and married again, but it isn’t the same and at times I question if I’ve made another mistake. Fast forward a number of years and he’s finally come out – in a very high profile way – and I feel vindicated and happy to have my friend back in my life even in a small way. Reading your blog has helped me to understand a little more about the issues my ex has grappled with and also hope that there are women out there who are supportive and open minded – you both rock!